SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member ... thinking of you.

[Former-Member]

I'm mixed up. Feel almost happy, elated... Given all that's happening - I'm not sure its sane, to feel this way, but not worried either. Hope it doesn't all come out sideways.

Found this beautiful Christian song re missing someone at Christmas
https://youtu.be/0yFXfAGl17M

[Owlunar]

Not awful @Former-Member - you are not going insane or anything - what you feel is perfectly natural under incredible pressure

This are toxic arond your mother and whew - she is trying to control you still and no one seems to notice that you had a pretty severe accident and (thank God) you were not injured or worse.

But you must have pain all over your body and feel really shaken up - and still your mother wants you to go down there and I am sure someone is trying to tell you something

Maybe something like this - you have gone into the toxic environment at least twice since I have known you and this is a far better thing that to be there at the end - you went and helped out when things were pretty dreadful at your parents' place and it was stressful for you both times - you did the better thing - and now nothing can stand in the way of what is coming - whether you are there or not - your mother will die and I really feel it will be a relief as it was when my mother died - I wasn't in a hurry to be there then either - and after all this I can say I never did

And your brother has been at it again - yeah - they need to let go - and you are not wrong or bad or thoughtless - you are incredibly thoughtful 

This is so hard Lapses - you are in my thoughts - yesterday was even more busy than most Fridays but I had time to think of you with life happenning as it does  

Lots of cyber-hugs Lapses

Dec

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Owlunar, you have no idea how good it is (well maybe you do) to have someone with your level of understanding to connect with. Thank you, and thanks for not leaving me alone and thanks for thinking of me even when your so busy and thanks for lighting candles. I nearly feel guilty receiving even under these circumstances because: (i) I live to tell the tail. (ii) I'm spared the emotionl / verbal abuse of my family over Christmas (believ it or not, losing a car is worth it, I don't think God wants me tbere) and (iii) I get to have Christmas with my son and around memories of my girl... And (iv) my birds are OK, well, the two bourke birds are. For the trip I had to give away my finches as nobody was free to mind them and I can only manage one cage in the car. Gave them to a neighbour with many big averies.

Taking antiinflammatories for back a couple days, helps but upsets asthma so wheen off them tomorrow.

Lucky woolies is one block away, andvi have a Granny Trolley tucked away. Need to grab a couple things.

My big bro rang yesterday, re accident, wow! Poor guy has MS and started eye injections to stop blindness from bad diabetes. His wife came back to him as a carer.

Hope you have a good Christmas ❤❤

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Former-Member .... 🤗💕

[Adge]

Hi @Former-Member I'm sorry to hear that you had to give your finches away.

Hopefully you can get some new ones, when you get back. Or maybe they will look after yours, & give them back to you later.

It must be rough having to get your shopping, without a car.

You sound very well-organised, & resilient (as my psychologist would say)...

Adge

[Owlunar]

---

@lapses wrote:
 (believ it or not, losing a car is worth it, I don't think God wants me tbere) 

---

I think that it would have been terribly hard for you spending Christmas with your family - toxicity is not something you need right now - you really have had a frenetic year with all sorts of things - you are trying to get ready to sell your house, parental issues, son issues, health issues and now your car

Yes - the message seems clear to me - and you have to think about another car or not - but one thing I really know for sure is that God never puts us through anything you are not able to cope with - and really - I could see it when you were procrastinating about going - it would be enough if it was just you and your oldies but most of the family????!!!! - oh glory - too much indeed

I was in hospital after a car accident when my son died - and I think that God knew he and I had been through enough and both of us were stressed out and I couldn't help him anymore and I had to tell him that. Whatever it was though I believe that God was in charge of everything and now it is in God's hands

I just lit the candle again - these do last a long time - and I was busy on Friday - I am - but not today except I have been getting ready for Christmas putting stickers on parcels and wrapping a few - mostly the girl at the pharmacy wraps them for me - I am really useless when it comes to wrapping stuff up.

And I have been cooking

I'm so glad your bourke birds are okay and sorry about your finches - but you are hear to tell the tale and I give thanks for that

And I do think I am on your wavelength - it is strange to think about Christmas 3 years ago when my mother was coming to the end of her life - thinking back now I know my decisions to keep away from her were something I sorted out again and again in my life for ages before she died and I had no idea how ill she was - but I saw her before she lost consciousness - a short time before she died and she couldn't speak or hear but I could see her regrets and I felt really sorry for her but I couldn't help her - she never let me - and now I have no regrets and I don't feel guilty at all

So I don't think you need to feel guilty - your posts about how things were for you with your family will still be here somewhere if you want to read them - and you did a lot - you really did - and now you are free to have Christmas however it comes with your sons and the memories or your daughter - 

I wish the best for you tomorrow Lapses - and hope the day is okay - it may be made of all kinds of thoughts and memories - but they are your thoughts and memories

The best Christmas possible my dear friend

Dec

Unto us a child is born - unto us a son is given

[Former-Member]

Thanks guys, how are you all?

Lovely image @Faith-and-Hope, healing 😊 thanks. Hope you're OK, and font mind building sandcastles lol hugzz💜

Hi @Adge, yes i was sad about finches but they'll be happier in the big cage. My son says I shouldn't be sad because they were an impulse buy (not sure what exactly he thinks that has to do with it), its quieter without them. I'm very tired. How's your new fence? Any plans for Chrissy? Cold beer 🍻

@Owlunar, you're good at seeing the bigger picture, and supportive of me. I don't feel that from anyone in real life, your like the best friend I never had, you & F&H that knows me well enough to say "hey, ya doing ok considering" Thanks for that 🙂 Are you getting around OK? Planning a nice Christmas Meal somewhere? Hope so. You take care 💜

I ducked up the shop, bought a new toaster (yes, old one stopped working yesterday), filled my granny trolley with fresh fruit & yummies for Christmas break with my son. It was heavy and hot out walking - the sore bones needed a break from the extra weight.

S1 just rang and said he's on his way (so hard not to worry about him on the roads). Tidy-up mode here for the next couple hours again. Said he'll visit his sister's headstone on the way, and maybe his dad.

Back to work...

[Former-Member]

Oops, forgot Darcy, and Dugga,
Happy Christmas @Former-Member & @Former-Member & NikNik 💜

[Adge]

Just me for Christmas @Former-Member.
It's been that way for years.
I cannot say that it's quiet because my very noisy neighbours are shoveling 1 whole tonne of gravel out the front - over their front wall.
Just to impress the many guests they have for their loud parties.
I have a local council charity lunch to go to tomorrow on Christmas day. That's all but it's something nice.
No beer for me, I don't like it. It gives me a bad sinus reaction.
My psychologist wasn't happy that I sent hampers to my family in NSW - but had no presents or anything Christmassy for myself.
So I was prompted to go out & buy a bottle of Scotch (1st ever).
Adge