SANE Online Forums

Hi @Bubbles3 .... I just want to say .... forgiveness is more about you than the other person.

Often the other person doesn’t care, or want, or need you to forgive them, but not forgiving them means that you are still carrying the pain and anger and bitterness of the situation forward with you.  

I am not talking about major trauma here.  That is in a different category, and requires a lot of support and therapy to get through.  

I am talking about the smaller stuff ..... people who have bullied you, or not been there for you, or were just mean in other ways.  Sometimes we can’t forgive them so much as we can hope something for them instead .... hope that they can become a better person.  That hope can be enough to be able to take them and put them outside your door .... away from you, in your heart and mind.

There are some different activities you can do to help you do this.  

One is to write down what you are struggling with on a piece of paper .... then tear it up, or throw it in the bin.  It symbolises putting it away from you.  You can make a paper boat out of it (simple origami) and watch it float away from you down a river.  You can tie it to a helium-filled balloon and watch it float up into the sky as you release it,

Releasing yourself from the pain and anger is what is important here ..... 

I hope this helps.