im back..... i think

[outlander]

The nurse said i like the fact that i came to her instead of the net and im.being honest and also explained everything. She said pap smear first of still ok then them dop pelvic exam but getting all std tests done and eveything as well.
But tomorrow's is the day

[Shaz51]

I am home now @outlander,

just answering all my messages  and then having a cuppa xx

[Former-Member]

Sometimes stress can cause lateness, try not to worry too much @outlander 💕
We'll be here for you. 😙

You need a cuppa ☕🍰

Hi @Shaz51 💜☕🍰

[outlander]

And she likes my thought train is good as well where im thinking more for my health not my past

[Owlunar]

Okay @outlander

That sounds like a lot - and your big day is tomorrow - I am glad you have that extra appointment time

What did the doctor say about your breast - how is the infection going

I understand that it is scary for you to be sitting around with men - that would be hard for you - but I am pretty sure that everyone of them was busy thinking about their own health issues - this is a small thought - maybe it will grow in time

STDs - um - that would be scary indeed - but good that you are having it all checked

Just keep breathing and remember we are all waiting and interested and caring and I think you have a bunch of Fairy God Mothers and Good Sisters here holding virtual hands with you

I'll be off to see my doctor soon - my visit is straight forward

Dec

[Shaz51]

What did the doctor say about your breast - how is the infection going == yes @outlander 

I'll be off to see my doctor soon -== hope everything is ok @Owlunar 

Hello @Former-Member, did you say tea or coffee

[Former-Member]

☕🍰🍵🍩 @Shaz51 💕👍👋

[Shaz51]

Hi @Former-Member  how are you my friend xx

[outlander]

Ok now that ive taken a breath I can respond properly to everyone
thank you … again.. for being with me and holding my hand ireally appreciate it and I hope someones around in the morning to do so again.

@Shaz51@Former-Member@Owlunar@Former-Member@Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Queenie

ok so the nurse has answered all my concerns and shes really reassuring and I feel comfortable with her. She said just coming in and asking about all those questions is a big step.
She proud that after I last appointment I went home and had a think about what we had a talk about.
Shes happy that I didnt go onto the internet to find out information and that im honest in the way im feeling and how nervous I am. She explains what she does with SA victims and everythign as well as she understands how traumatising it must be for us to get it done. She offered to do the exam today but I declined and said I would like it done asap while im 'ok' with it so im booked in for tomorrow at 10am. She said im not comfortable I could dont the STD testing through urine sample but I think its easier to get it all done in one hit so its all done and the less I have to worry about. She said do those first then see how I go with the rest of the pelvic exam if its not ok shes happy to stop and organise it for when im ready to. She pretty much giving me the reins and letting me have control over everything and shes reassured me shes very experienced and I do trust her shes been at the clinic for years now.
I told her ive nearly skipped my cycle for 2 months now and she was going to get my gp in but I said no not today. And she said thats fine. I was giving her some of my other symptoms as well and she said well we can test for any infections etc as well and since ive been on antibiotics its quite possible its caused an imbalance somewhere and with all the medications changes as well..
im hoping it doesnt come tomorrow ive only got a few hourse until I go back so im actually fingers crossed my period doesnt come to I can get all the test done.
She also like the fact that im doing it for my health not because of past reasons. Im trying to just keep thinking its for my health nothing more.
Yes the big day is tomorrow I am freaking out quite a lot but since my questions have been answered im slightly ok but I havent got there yet but shes said booking the double appointment is a good idea in case I need abit of extra time for slowness and recovery as well if I need it and to just sit there for a few minutes before I walk back out
yeah I just played on my phone, it didnt help that one of the males kept talking to himself but theres other females around as well which was a little more comforting.
I was talking to my nurse about the infection and she also said I will be sore for a few days and it will take a few days to get the infection under control, but keep an eye on temperature but dont be afraid to go back to gp or anything including hospital.
I didnt see my gp as I couldnt handle 2 stressfull appointments in one day. So I see my gp on wednesday unless I get my gp to come in and check and have a chat around my period as well at the same time tomorrow but after the smear and exam
I want to get tested STD so it doesnt fester into something worse and linger around when I can treat it now, im going to try and be brave and get the full works done inlcuding the breast exam as well so I dont know how im going to eb afterwards but I think its better to get it done in one go rather than in sections. Then I can just deal with the stress and then wont have to worry about it for another 2 years unless otherwise. Im getting results sent to her and ive booked that appointment for the results as well as I dont want anyone finding it and I feel better if shes with me and explains it

I feel like I really need to hurl again- YUK YUK YUK

[outlander]

also thank you to @CheerBear @utopia @Former-Member as well for standing by me

and yes i too think i ahve many 'mothers' and 'sisters' on here that understand what im going through and i ireally appreciate it.

i think i need to do some drawings so calm the nerves abit, cause i cant study so i dont want to force it otherwise ill get frustrated so i think nows a good time to do some drawing and have a cup of tea thanks tea lady 😉 @Former-Member

i hope your appointment goes well for you too @Owlunar still holding your hand and i cant wait in the waiting room foor you if you prefer