Best Friends Club

[Healandlove]

@Shaz51 thank you. You are a survivor too like me. Dear sister. I am making myself busy in the kitchen.  And then I will take the kids to walk the doggie. I hope my husband stays home. I don't actually want to be around him ATM.

Thank you for your empathy 🙏🏻 xxxx

[MJG017]

@Healandlove 

Well that quickly turned...just recovering in the car after my husband had a meltdown over something I disagreed on. 

I'm sorry you have to deal with this, it must be so difficult knowing it can happen so quickly.  When he does get stressed, I guess you are usually the person right there and so are the one in the firing line.

I think walking away is the best option and the best way to avoid inflaming the situation.  I know he struggles a lot with this, but obviously it makes it very difficult for you as well.

He was happy yesterday and smiling yesterday and today he is in a hole.

This kind of reminds me a bit about myself.  I find that if I have a day when I'm actually happy and enjoying myself, at some time, usually towards the end of the day but not always... the thought will hit me that things used to be this way a lot more often and I miss it and once this current little respite is over, it will be back to the new 'normal'.  So I find my emotional lows can come quite quickly after a high.

I do react differently than yiur husband, I tend to just completely withdraw.  I know my partner finds it confusing and probably upsetting.  It happened yesterday and I can tell she's concerned and she does ask what is wrong, but I still feel like I need to keep it to myself... maybe in some guilt ridden attempt to shield her from the worst of it.  I feel bad because at the very least she must find it so confusing that my mood can change so quickly and seemingly out of nowhere.  So I know I need to get better at talking about it with her and reading you post, and all the replies, this morning I think a bit of an apology in there somewhere as well is very well deserved for all she puts up with from me.  I honestly don't know why I find it so hard.

Will this ever get better?

I need to hope so.  I hope your husband can find a better understanding of his own issues and learnt to control them better, or at least manage the effects better.  We all have our own issues we struggle to deal with and for me it makes it a lot harder knowing it is affecting the one person in the world that least deserves it.  Hopefully your husband, like me, sees this and can improve as well... for the both of you.

[ArraDreaming]

I can understand why the Alice was not for you @RiverSeal it’s for everyone some people need a wider circle or more opportunitys

[MJG017]

@Mustang67  

Well that sucks about your friend moving to Tasmania, but at least you get some time now to continue to catch up and then you have a holiday destination.

There definitely had been a change in your mindset from what I can see.  Even when there's a bit of bad news, like your friend moving to Tassie next year, you immediately see some positives in it.  I really think that takes a big change in our thinking to do that, not to mention a lot of strength to get to that point.  So there's a lot of reasons now to be extremly proud of yourself.  It feels safe to say this weekend has been a big turning point for you... like that light at the end of the tunnel is visible now. 

If you're looking for something to do tonight, you could come to the sunday chat.  Its strictly BYO wine but we always have a good time.  

[greenpea]

@Glisten  hey G wonderful rain is still falling. listening to the cure atm. omg ladies i have lost some of the bulge!!! had middle son for a sleep over which was great. he was in good form which makes it easier for all of us. hope you have had a super pea weekend. love to everyonexx

[greenpea]

@Blackcloud  hey Blackcloud two of my children have asd so i know how tough it can be to find work and cope with socialising. i have schizoaffective disorder and ptsd.  i see things and hear things that are not there. just then i heard some one moving in the unit it is onlly me and my daughter here and she was at her computer. stay strong the right job will come alongxx

[Mustang67]

@MJG017 The last workshop that I did, really resonated with me, and it made me realise that with enough will power you can turn you thinking around.

We have started pulling my poessions out of the spare room, and I intend to donate as much as I can. The ex's mum is staying at Christmas time, so we need to fit a bed in there. So while I am in this positive mindset, I want to get rid of as much as possible. 

So if I need a break I might join you for chat, it just depends where I am up to with the sorting.

And I am proud of myself. I have broken a behaviour that has been effecting me for 21 years. So hopefully now, the years to come will only get better. 

I just signed up to receive information from Roland Bal to help resolve Complex Trauma & PTSD.

It is designed to help those who suffer with Complex Trauma or PTSD to make real progress, so that you can live a normal life again. It sounds very interesting, so I will give it a go.  

https://rolandbal.com/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR1cnPviEwrpkIXwecFRJ02-20m8WSPTFD5sMs6A3gNJ7P7C6aBl... 

[ENKELI]

@Glisten Kelly was a Border Collie. She ruined me for any other dog. I got her when I split from my ex fiancé and she was my healing dog. I had her for 13 years. I have considered getting a dog but it's never happened. I think I am a one dog woman! 

[ENKELI]

@Glisten thank you, and incidentally I do have red hair. For now at least!!

Yes, a sauna is something your eccentric friends should have included in the A frame. I mean it just makes no sense to have an A frame sans sauna. It's just wrong. 

I hope you recovered from the drenching, and smart move keeping the phone away from wet bums!! I stopped putting my phone in my back pocket when it fell out into the toilet. And yes I did retrieve it!! I had pulled my jeans down to go and it fell out so the water was clean at least! 

I hope your weekend has been good so far. I have been pottering with plants and housework, not sure what I'll do today aside from grocery shopping. 

[Shaz51]

Thank you @MJG017 for your message 

Yes it is hard , confusing and upsetting to see our love ones like this and each day is so different 

🥰 @Healandlove