not feeling good

[Owlunar]

That's so sad @BlueBay 

We all only have this life and for you - your's is such a bummer - 

Okay - obviously something needs to change - I thought about this for a while and there is only one person who can do this and that's you - so I thought about this for a while

If you could change one thing - one thing you could relalistly alter - what would that be? Could you do that? What would it cost you? How would you implement it?

There is an old saying - "Why sit in the darkness when you could light a candle?" 

I will light one for you - hopefully one little candle burning in my house for you - and for myself today - might give you hope

But hope for what? I know - I almost heard you right then

Dec

Though all lights can go out - let this little light burn through the dark hours for youActually it's a much bigger candle than I thought

[BlueBay]

Thankyou @Owlunar  ❤️

I’ve just come home from hospital again very high blood pressure and fast heart rate during the night. Tests came bsvk ok. Going back to my doctor tomorrow morning. 

I need to rest for now but want to reply to you properly. I’ll reply soon. Xxxx

[BlueBay]

Hi @Owlunar 

I feel crap. Im exhausted and have a headache. I’m so glad I have tomorrow off. I just have no energy. 

Also I think I was affected by yesterday’s horrible argument between the pharmacist and a vi-worker. It was horrible @Owlunar   We are short staffed now on a Monday do the dispensary technician (she helps the pharmacist) was busy doing medication changes and helping me serve customers. We were busy. This lady finishes work at 4pm and didn’t put all the medications on the shelves. There was one box of stock left. When the lady finished wirk the pharmacist let loose and said that she needed to put all the stock away. The lady says she was flat out all day and will finish it off tomorrow. But the pharmacist lost her cool snd screamed at her and yelling at her saying hiw zngry she was eith her. It went in for at least 10 mins. 

This was all in front of me. It was disgusting and totally nit called fir. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. The pharmacist was totally in the wrong. 

I phobed the lady last night yo make sure she was ok. She was crying on the phone saying she was scared she’ll lose her job. 

I think hearing all that left me feeling sick sngry snd shocked. It was the first time she had yelled but so loud. It did have an effect on me. I hate it. 

So maybe this contributed to tiday not been well. 

The pharmacist is busy organising her wedding. She only decided 3 weeks ago that they’re getting married next week. She does a lot of personal stuff at work. 

I want to let our supervisor know but am scared she’ll find out. I don’t know what to do. 

Whst would you do?

[Owlunar]

HI @BlueBay 

That was horrible and inappropriate of your boss - and I don't know what you should do in such a situation - but  you asked what I would do

Okay - I would confront the pharmacist and tell her how I felt about being an observer of such an outburst - it was a really hostile situation. I would be feeling really hot under the collar about all of it

I assume your pharmacy is part of a chain - if that's the case you have more power - it is within your rights to approach the people who own the chain and inform them of your discomfort - it's really hard to know because I wasn't there but from things you have said it's not the best run place in the world and maybe this is why - your boss is busy doing her own stuff at work and really!!!!!!!!!!! Organising a wedding in three or four weeks - not a good idea - and she cut half an hour out from your time at work - 

You're not happy there - I know that - and maybe there is always an undercurrent of tension there - perhaps you pick it up unconsciously - I know there are times when you just work alone and do what you have to and I think you are a good worker

But you are non-confrontational and I am the kind of person who speaks out so I guess you have to really consider your options before you speak to your boss about the argument and how you feel - it's not good to be a witness

But you are within your rights to report this to the owners of the chain - but speak to her first

Also - think - this outburst had affected you badly - it's a form of bullying - not to you but to the co-worker - 

It's really hard to say - I only know no job has been that important to me to put up with the wrong thing happening and I have risked being dismissed because I would not break certain work-ethics - I have been dismissed but I have stood up more often and I have been respected

So after all that waffling - I would confront the pharmacist and tell her how uncomfortable I was about all of it - and take the chips where they fall - if you suffer discrimination about it then take it to the owners of the chain 

I know one things for sure - whatever happens you will feel empowered by doing something about it and not just taking it and feeling uncomfortable. Either way it's not easy but it's better to act - I would not be comfortable being a witness to such an outburst

You have a couple of days to think about it and chat about it - other people will have different ideas and the most important thing is to think of yourself and not just for the present but for the future

Dec

[BlueBay]

Hi @Owlunar  thsnks fir your reply. Last night I decided to text another pharmacist who works with us one day a week. But he has been with our pharmacy fir years and I get along with him quite well. I wanted to speak eith him so he called me. We spoke for a while and I told him what happened on Monday. He told me to either call my pharmacy supervisor or email him and tell him everything. He said that the supervisor needs to know. It’s workplace bully. I told him that I’m scared of confrontation and he said that the supervisor won’t say who told him. 

But he said that the worker involved has already put a complaint in and so the supervisor will most likely want to talk to me as well. 

I wrote  the email and e explained everything and told him it was unprofessional of the pharmacist to be screaming at a worker. And how it affected me as I felt very unease and shocked. 

This supervisor has been really good to me when I’ve been in hospital. Very supportive. 

Now we’ll see what he’s reply will be. 

Apparently it’s not the first time the pharmacist has been unprofessional. She told off another staff member and got her upset. I only found this out last night. 

@Owlunar  I really hate confrontation and yelling and abuse. It has affected me snd I think that’s part of why my blood pressure went up. I went back to my childhood and also a previous job where I was yelled at all the time by a builder. That left an impact on me. 

I know I’ve done the right thing. I just hope the pharmacist doesn’t take it out on me. I couldn’t handle that if she did. 

I’m really tired and have a headache. I’ve been awake since 4.30sm and can’t fall back to sleep. I’ve been crying alone in bed. Hubby gone to wirk at 4am. 

Seeing my doctor this morning about my blood pressure. I’ll let you know how I go. 

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Razzle 💕

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay 

I slept late this morning - I have just read your post and goodonyer for speaking out - you have done the right thing

None of us like confrontation - I told you have had spoken out in the past and it is always uncomfortable - it does take us back to our childhood and we were all little children once and at the mercy of parents, other relatives, siblings and worst of all - some school teachers and my guess is you went to a Catholic School - nothing more to say except I have already heard about it and know

But it does help more than you know to do affirmative action - and you have support - so yes - your BP will go up and you will be upset - and I already know everyone or anyone telling you to calm down is pretty useless - that statement never really works for me - when I want the world to hear me I let everyone know -

And you have - and it is hard to stand up to bullies - and I hope the pharmacist where you work doesn't have a go at you but if she does - don't take any crap - 

I tell you what - go out and buy yourself an owl - they are all over the place - they are very popular - and take it to work with you and put it somewhere you can see it all the time but where it's not very obvious and imagine we are in the shop and watching over you all the time - or maybe it would be some other object you feel you connect with - 

Mostly I have done office work so I have always had things I like on my desk - people do this all the time - and then - take it home and put it where you can see it - and if you get upset focus on it instead of Miss Bully Britches. 

Most people are bullied at some time in their lives - I was lucky in the world but at home my younger siblings would give me a hard time - I would give them an equally hard time when our parents were out of the way but they kept it up into adult life and I have abandoned them to their fate - 

So I know how awkward and overpowering it can be

It's really hard - but you have done the right thing speaking out and I know it's hard not to worry about the immediate future but you are safe if you have an ally and right now - at work - you have two - the lady who had the rough time yesterday and the man you spoke to last night

It's nearly lunchtime and for once I wish I had got up earlier to answer your post - it was an important one and I am so glad you tagged me - 

I had one of my bad days yesterday and feel better today - sometimes we need a long sleep and I hope you can sleep well tonight. Today do what pleases you - if you want to stay in bed and cry that's okay really - when you feel like getting up take a walk on this lovely day - I would love to walk on the beach today and wish I didn't have to get a bus to be there but the day isn't over.

Be kind to yourself - you didn't cause this event but you have been positive about it - and let me know about your BP later - btw - are you taking BP medication?

Thinking of you today

Dec

[BlueBay]

I love the pictures you put up @Owlunar 

I saw my doctor this morning and my blood pressure is still very high. I have a shocking headache and pain meds are doing nothing. He has agreed that my blood pressure needs to be carefully monitored. He is now tweeking my medication a little in the hope it brings it down. But it needs to come down slowly and not too quickly as that’s not good. 

I did my grocery shopping today and now just sitting outside in the deck listening to the birds.  It’s a nice day. 

My son has bought chicken fir dinner so I don’t have to worry about dinner. 

Going for a walk later with A to the park. Think I’ll buy her an ice cream as a treat. 

I’m so glad you’re feeling better today. 

[Owlunar]

I have BP medication myself @BlueBay  and I know it has to be watched - I have my own BP Monitor and only need to check it a couple of times a week but there are times when anyone needs to test it a couple of times a day and it's really important

I thought that my high blood pressure was caused by stress and chronic pain but whatever the cause the BP needs to be treated and it so happens that for me the medication I am taking helps with anxiety as well - it was been pretty good for nearly a year and I am still using the first packet I have had for it since I got onto the right medication and it is only a low dose

I really hope you get onto the right kind - there are many different kinds - something will work for you - it's just a case of finding the one that works for you

Taking a walk with A sounds wonderful - and give yourself a treat too - you are worth it and you did a great thing getting contacting the victim of the bullying and then the man you know who advised you. True - this is all hard but you did it

You are not at fault about what happened - you were there and it was an unwise and rather vicious attack by the boss and not at all appropriate - and your actions since have been hard for you but better in the long run - speaking out is a good thing when you need to and everytime you stand up for others and yourself will help your self-esteem 

And don't worry about tomorrow - tomorrow will care for itself

And looking at those owls - the big owl knows it all - believe me - older people know nearly all the stories 

Sending hugs

Dec

[BlueBay]

Hi @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Razzle 

nit feeling good st the moment. Took new medication for blood pressure but I think it’s dropped it too much cause I’m dizzy. 

I don’t know what to do. 

I don’t want to bother my doctor again. 

Just feel so tired 

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay 

It's not a question of bothering your doctor - it's important to let him know

I think he told you that this has to be monitored - I know it's really important

In the meantime if your blood pressure is too low don't try and walk around - rest lying down if possible - loss of balance could cause a fall - 

Tough yards - I know

Dec