Life can be a Pain

[Owlunar]

Hi @Former-Member

Gotta catch up later - the screen is aggravating my headache

Thinking of you though

Dec

[Former-Member]

Have you read this book Dec?  Highly recommend it.  

Sorry you have a headache again. ?Eye Strain?  Do you need your eyes checked?  Blood pressure? Thick blood?  Stress?  Maybe borrow audio books for times like this when you can't  tollerate screens. My mum and i have got a lot out of shoving a transistor radio under our pillow, especially in the wee smallInight hours 😞  I like abc talkback the most or in Sydney 2CH has good music,  or Vision Radio. 

I'm trying to defrost curry chicken the old fashion way - taked soooooooo long.

Hope tomorrow's betta for you.  I pushed myself hard today,  had to lay down when i got home 

[Shaz51]

@Owlunar, it is good to get things off our chest and off our mind my friend

I find it hard to find someone I can talk to , I can talk to my mum but I don`t like talking to her about mr shaz and his MI

Mum knows some things but not everything

mr shaz is having suncancer surgery tomorrow

and on monday mr shaz is having a gallbladder scan and blood tests

[Owlunar]

Hi @Shaz51

Yes - it is good to share something that has been hidden for years - I have thought about it through time but never came near to deciding whether it was a good decision or a bad one - and nothing anyone says will be able to ease that I think - but I have let it out into the air now and can discuss it when I get back to see my therapist

Life is full of puzzles yeah? - like you can tell your Mum about a lot of things but not anything about Mr Shaz and his MI - and really - if your Mum doesn't understand such things it is better to keep it to yourself - like my hidden story it can be confusing to share with the wrong people - I am close to my daughter but there are things I can't share - but she is maturing - she is intelligent but I think her early life was more about the traumatic life her brother was leading and she learned to hold things to herself

So - on top of everything else Mr Shaz has by now had sun cancer surgery and on Monday - eeaakk - gall bladder scans and blood tests. As I said earlier as time passes I am getting to know Mr Shaz and I feel a bit like one of the family - getting older is full of "stuff" - tests and operations and aches and pains and tired skin, tired knees, trashed spinal discs, dried and tired tendons - we have had our back to the wall and our shoulder to the wheel etc for longer now and it all gets tedious

I hope it all goes well for both of you - sigh - my precious daughter is having a laparoscopy in a couple of weeks and having an IUD done - whatever they do with IUDs - for her bad periods and to check for endometriosis - oh what?? - my first reaction was why does she need an IUD but maybe this will work and she won't need an endometrial ablation 

Family history - nearly woman has had a hysterectomy - let's hope the IUD does the trick

All this stuff that keeps happening - okay - Dad and I had this joke that whatever went on in life was better than the alternative and which ever one of us said that the other one would say "How do you know?"

I guess we will both here about our significant other's test results as time passes and I hope Mr Shaz' surgery was okay - I hope the cancer was still small

Dec

[Owlunar]

Hi @Former-Member

I haven't read that - but I know the reference which I think is in the Psalms -

There are several books I want to read - I keep trying to get myself around to going to the pubic library - still have a card - but it's walking distance and still a good walk but I have this new excuse and I am sticking to it - I'm getting older and my legs ache a lot - and my legs used to ache a lot from running but this is different - sigh - but still - I could catch a bus

Keep asking me sis and maybe I will get myself there - life is entirely different without a car - how I wish I had one - or could drive - actually I think my back and knees are too stiff and I have to give that wish away but still - if people sound resigned and say "Can't complain" I tend to say "Why not?" I really do think that a little complaining releases a lot of inner stress and a lot of sorrow about what time can take away and with that done - we can see more clearly what time has given us

I felt uneasy and irritable when my Dr wrote that I had reactive depression on my mental health plan - not just in my history but as if I have it now. Okay - I seemed to spend a lot of time with a heat pack - watching TV and waiting for the back pain to ease off - I asked myself if this was okay with me after having chronic pain for a long long long time - and it is not pleasant at all to have pain but I am used to the condition and orthopaedic issues is the devil I know so - after all the decided I am not depressed.

So I went outside and the sky was full of  stars and the crescent moon was there and the breeze was warm and it was a lovely night - I rejoiced - and realised whatever is causing my stress and headaches is tiring but not unbearable - the toothache was - ooh

Horrible - yes - and I do use that toothpaste the dentist recommends every second day and a high fluoride one the rest of the time - 

The tooth-grinding and the stress has been building up for a long time and acting on finding out what was truly happening and working on family issues is unusal for me because I fell out of the family tree a long time ago and except for my Tassie Rellies I stayed out of it - only seeing people at the frequent family funerals we have had over the last years - always one person less - and so yeah - this has been tough for me

And the headaches - stress related - I have plenty of up-to-date glasses - all slighty different for different light etc - I have a family history of macula degeneration so I get to have medicare visits to the optometrist every year and the last time was recent - but thanks for asking me these things - one never knows what other people are fussy about or neglect and any ideas can be useful

But yes - life is improving - today it's raining buckets - but the air is fresh and clean - after a hot summer then thought of winter is less alarming but it is warm enough today for shorts - 

I hope you are okay - are you posting in the carers forum because I seem to be missing your posts?

Aw - yeah

Dec

[Owlunar]

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

I was looking through the pictures of flowers and saw this and thought you would really like this one

it's called a glass flower and I don't know if it's really or art but reality is what reality is and I think it's wonderful

I am wondering how you are - I am not sure where you are posting and I get really busy on this thread and I can never seem to post short posts - and time passes

So I don't know where you are up to in your family adventures - and bear in mind that life is what happens to us when we are making other plans - but you certainly have enough in your family to keep you going to your coffee shop in the morning

Thinking of you often Faith

Dec

[Shaz51]

thank you my very dear friend @Owlunar

today we had another doctors  appt this morning whcih a letter was sent to a specialist 3 years ago and we had the appt today -- Mr shaz did not know weather to go or not , but we did go , so home now and having a coffee

fingers crossed for your daughter that everything will be ok

[Former-Member]

Hi @Shaz51 xox
Yes @Owlunar, i usuallyl go to carers 'DDDad' & LE 'GoodMorning' i'll try rememberIto tag'ya more. I think depressii. is cominguback, I'm slumping & scared how low I'll sink, and demands are high but apart from lots of rest i dont know what else to do. Maybe walk more, but yes - it hurts & im tired.

You seem to be brighter PTL! One day at a time my friend xox

[Owlunar]

Hi @Former-Member

I remember from last year - I know you go down when the weather gets wintery and this year you have the added issues of your mother dying and now the change in your life of caring for your Dad. And as much as caring for you Dad brings good vibes for you it is also hard yards - 

So as unpleasant as it is to feel yourself sinking - join me with the winter-blues - I get Seasonal Affective Disorder too and we can have it together

And I do understand about walking - it hurts and you are tired - me too - I am blaming my chairs - they are too low and I need a recliner - I will look on the internet and at Easter when I see my son-in-law I will ask if he can come with me because he has a ute - 

Let me think though - aw it is so far in the past - the first thing I felt and thought when my son died was that it was over. He was so troubled and got into so much trouble I was stressed down to the soles of my shoes - and of course it was not over - I bet your thoughts and feelings are all in a jangle right now - your mother was suffering a lot in different ways and you know better than anyone how distraught she was. It took me a long time to sort our my thoughts and feelings about losing someone - I think that it's harder when the relationship was strained

Thanks for telling me where you post - I will try and find those - I don't normally go into the Carers' Forum

Care for yourself too Lapses

Dec

[Owlunar]

Sheesh @Shaz51

I know our medical system is a long story of waiting and hoping etc but waiting three years for a specialist has to be some kind of record - I certainly hope this was not a serious matter and it could wait

I hope all this stuff Mr Shaz has happening works out all right 

And yes - thanks about my daughter - I will let you know

Dec