Difficulty telling people how I really feel.

[Sahara]

I had good news! Dad is just going through a rough patch and his cancer is not actually any worse. The specialist rang me to explain everything. We are lucky to have her- she is very caring.

Dad has to stay in hospital for a while, though.

I rang my sister to explain everything that the specialist said to me, and she was very relieved. I am still worried about my Sis though, as she is extrememly stressed in general and probably should be getting help. 

[Former-Member]

@Sahara That is great news. Well not that you day has cancer but that it hasn’t got worse. Even better that the specialist rang you instead of you having to rely on you Dad to tell you. So pleased for you.

Hopefully with this news your sisters stress levels go down a bit.

💗💗

[Sahara]

Thanks you @Former-Member.

My Sis is a lot better... but only for now. As soon as Dad's health starts getting worse, she will go down-hill, I think.

I had a chat about her with my Brother and he says she is just like our Mum was. Highly-strung and stressed out all the time, that is.

I said to him, "yes, I guess she is like our Mum, but if I can help her to see the light.... maybe she doesn't have to be that way."

My Bro then just laughed this kinda fake laugh and said "Are you kidding me? She will never change."

One thing I have accept is that she isn't really my responsibilty, either way. I can talk to her, but it's up to her if she really wants to make any changes in her life. 

Right now I just see her a a person with an incredibly jam-packed schedule that starts at 6 am and ends at 10.30 at night, where there is not even one moment she has to herself, hence, no enjoyment at all in her entire life. 

Who would live that way??

[Former-Member]

@Sahara

Your brother is right. Your sister sounds like my mum!

I guess some people cannot see themselves and hard to look from the outside at times. I have told my mum she needs to go see someone and get some help but continuly denies she needs help. I have learnt that unless she is willing to change, my hands are tied.

[Sahara]

Yes, @Former-Member,

our hands are absolutely tied! We can only gently make suggestions and that is all we can do. People have to live their own lives and make their own decisions... even though sometimes it can be very uncomfortable to watch them being unhappy- it is still their choice and people must have their freedom, no matter what.

The only time we can really step in is when someone is psychotic, or they are an immediate physical  danger to themselves or someone else. Then we must act.

But otherwise.... we can only listen and show empathy.