Am Not Coping

[Zoe7]

@Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Pepsimax @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @Teej @Snowie @Sans911 @Owlunar @BlueBay @utopia @outlander @Former-Member and all following along or passing through...

I am home from dinner and it was lovely but I could barely keep my eyes open - it was quite warm in the restaurant and it has been a long day. I still need to do the planning for tomorrow so will be up for a bit longer tonight. I do have a free block of time tomorrow at school that I can do some of the planning for Friday and there is an assembly in the afternoon so I only have half day really to plan for tomorrow. I should be able to do that tonight and then still get to bed relatively early.

Today was a long day - in my GP appointment we went through all the blood test results - everything is really good there - infact it is the healthiest she has seen me since I first got sick just over 2 years ago - that was reassuring that we are definitely heading in the right direction.

We had a different facilitator for DBT as the usual one was unwell today so that was a bit of a shock but we all handled it well - and she was really nice. I talked a little today about work and how it is going and what skills have helped me get through some of the more difficult times - as well as mentioning the amazing support I have had from here - it can never be underestimated how much this forum and the beautiful people here have helped me 

My pdoc was really pleased with how I am doing and made a point of stating how wonderfully she thinks I have handled the whole work situation from the intial meetings until now - I had to agree with her that I think I am doing pretty well considering all that has been thrown at me. We talked a little about my missing people feelings but acknowledging that it is what it is and I can't do anything about that. It is hard when those you have relied on, leant on, shared and been on so much of this journey with are either not there anymore or at an arms length (for now anyway) ...and Yes I do super miss you Hon @Faith-and-Hope 

I then went to my psych appointment and we talked a little more about how I was feeling about moving schools and the toxic environment at the school for me now. Confidentiality had been broken there by another teacher and there are many more external factors to do with the school being in a town where I was brought up. My psych knows all about those issues so she can see why moving for me has extra dimensions - not simply the lack of trust and difficulties with the principal. It has cemented in my mind that I have made the right decision - the future is still unknown at this stage but with new light comes new opportunities (feel like I am channelling F&H ). We also did some relaxation before I left which did help me feel more at ease also.

Came home to a jumpy, happy, smiling fluffball who was so excited to see me - makes all those not so nice things fade into the background a bit when you have that to greet you. Cat is happy as well - as long as she is fed she is happy though!

Wow that was a spill and a half. Now I better start this planning for tomorrow.

[outlander]

It sounds like a big day but had positives in there. Your doing well @Zoe7 its inspiring. Keep on keeping on ❤

[utopia]

@Zoe7 sounds like a very busy but productive day

[Zoe7]

Thank you @utopia and @utopia and all those behind the support button @Shaz51 @Teej @Sans911 

I am about half way through my planning and it is coming together ok - I am a bit concerned that I will be too tired to get through tomorrow and Friday but I can only do what I can do and see how it goes. I am going to finish the Literacy and then take my meds - hopefully I won't be too tired in the morning having taken then so late.

Hope you have all had some light in my day ...you guys all here supporting me today has been my biggest light - just sayin' 

[outlander]

@Zoe7 ☺🤗💚💙

[Zoe7]

I see you there Hon and can now go to bed happy that I have connected with you today too. Love ya @Faith-and-Hope 💜💙💚🧡💛😀

[Zoe7]

Finally finished planning for tomorrow - off to bed now to snuggle up with Toby for a little while before I sleep ...which considering how tired I am shouldn't take long. Catch you all tomorrow 😴

[CheerBear]

Calling by quickly to say that it was great to hear about your day and evening last night @Zoe7. I especially liked the jumpy, happy, smiling fluffball part 🐶❤

Hope today goes well for you and it isn't too tiring 💗

[Maggie]

Sending these for today @Zoe7 💛💕💜🐾🐾🐾

[outlander]

Good luck for today @Zoe7 hope it sll goes well