Am Not Coping

[oceangirl]

@Zoe7 I think she will be okay, thanks for your concern.

[Former-Member]

Hi Lisajane, didn't realise your kids were and at, that's been hard for you bit hopefully they atr coping somehow. Try do all those things you never get time form

Zoe, its fair enough that you're hypervigilant after that experience today. But doesn't sound like he was targeting you, maybe stoned and thought you were creeping up on him haha

I had a flasher jump out from buildings once, i stared into his eyes as I walked past as if nothing was odd,, bof t i knew not to look down, I'll never forget those eyes of his. Not drugs like you as, but, a spirit, mennasing. A nurse was abducted from that street and murdered not long after, I've always felt guilty for not reporting him after her. Its stuck with me decades. My higher self at he time guided my responses which I think saved me.

Another story, your events today made me think of a a similar time i finally resurfaced out of a lengthy valley: 5 years back leading up to a major breakdown, I went missing, hiding from everyone. They even broke into my house looking for me more than once, inc the police, I made myelf invisible hiding in cupboards etc. All quite silly looking back, but my point is, when I came out of hiding, and went to visit a friend, her normally placid old Rottweiler bit me badly, I had to have stitches and tetanus and antibiotics. I crawled back under my rock for anothet week trying to make sense of life. Like you say, why can't it get easier? But does change for the better, if we endure. Most days are so much better than then for me, believe it or not, I was bad. Hang in there Zoe, you'll feel safe again soon. ❤❤❤

[Zoe7]

@Former-Member you have nothing to be sorry about - you didn't write anything that you shouldn't have - and my present state is definitely not in any way your fault. Please know that lj - definitely NOT your fault and NOTHING to be sorry about 

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Former-Member - missing them hugely. sometimes its impossible to ever really feel safe, i dont actually know if i know what safe is. when i first got together with my ex (i was so young) i think i felt safe for a short time, that i'd found somewhere safe. but that didnt last. im not sure if i'll get to feel safe again. i dont know.I'm glad that you can feel/see some improvement since those hard times when you were hiding fromthe world and glad you're here where you can be seen 🙂

[utopia]

@Zoe7 - that would scare and trigger me too. Thank god he walked away and you and Toby got inside the house - where you are safe.
Oh moneyproblems or lack of money. If causes such acute stress. I hear you. I do sincerely hope your money is in tomorrow.
Mum drove me up to the big town today so I could deal with CentreLink. They had rejected my last medical certificate - but no reason was recorded in the system. But the lady fixed it. Then I gave her my next certificate - for the next month. I explained there is a gap between last month's certificate and this month's certificate. She promised It wouldn't matter and wouldn't come back to bite me. I have to trust her. But for the time being, I still get to receive my little CentreLink payment.
Sending you a big hug my friend and I hope tonight offers you a deep and dreamless sleep. ♥♥♥

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Zoe7 ..... 💚💕

[Owlunar]

Hi @Former-Member

That was really rough and scary - and it has scarred you too - we have to be so alert - I have been stalked a couple of times and it is not pleasant - in my case - not serious either. We do tend to become hyper-viligant though - and for good reason

And @utopia

Yes - I know you have to trust the woman at Centrelink about your certificate - I am sure your doctor can write another one - unless it was the horrible doctor - but still - it's tense for you with all of this happening

I hope you either get disability or something - this has gone on for so long. Of course - we all want the best for you

Dec

[Owlunar]

Hi @Zoe7

That was a very scary thing to happen - you did the right thing to ask him if you could help him in some wayd - puts people a step back at times - 

But wow - how aggressive that he kicked your fence! - I am sure you were rattled with that happening - I would be - it's not nice at all

Do you live in a safe area? For a while I didn't and it could be unnerving - I hope this - or something like it - doesn't happen again

I hope your money gets in today - I don't know what kind of allowance you get but mine comes in on a Wednesday

Dec

[Shaz51]

@Zoe7 

[Faith-and-Hope]

💚💐🌷💕🦋💜 .... @Zoe7