Topic Tuesday // How do you support yourself through the festive season // Tues 11 Dec, 7pm AEDT

[Robert_Lifeline]

@BlueBay

Hi BlueBay, yes this putting on a mask can be draining and taxing emotionally and mentally. 

[Dave1977]

I actually struggle with this Robert. I’m pretty resilient normally and don’t really appreciate that I have triggers to be careful of, so when I am triggered it’s usually a surprise to me and I’m usually deeply affected by the event.

[BlueBay]

How can you be “happy” when you’re screaming and crying inside. This family togetherness is not real for me snymire. @Former-Member@Robert_Lifeline

[Robert_Lifeline]

@Dave1977

Hi Dave, What is it about the 'togetherness' that makes you feel even more alone and isolated? I am just curious..

[utopia]

I'm used to isolating myself to a degree @ & when I choose to come out of that hibernation,  I normally socialise one on one. 

On Christmas day there will be about 20 people at the lunch we are attending. 

Crowds make me anxious.  Even if I know the people. 

I worry that I won't be able to be "happy" on the day,  so will bring everyone down. 

Then there's everyone who will ask how I'm going.  How I'M REALLY GOING (eg: my mental health) . It will be a focus again,  and I don't like that focus. 

[Former-Member]

Some of your experience speaks to me too @utopia  Thank you for sharing.

[Dave1977]

It’s the ongoing feeling I have of being all alone in the world. I can usually manage that feeling day by day, but at this time of year all you can see around you is messages of cheer and good will, togetherness and love, happiness and celebrations of the people you love.

That’s all well and good, but for those of us who are largely alone and isolated those constant messages just serve to highlight the things I feel I’m missing out on.

[Robert_Lifeline]

@utopia

Hi, this is a good point about being the focus and not wanting to be.. There seems to be a theme emerging of having to 'go through the motions' and pretending for the sake of the family.. I wonder, if this family enaggement is inescapable to a degree, how can we engage in a way that is safe for us? (i.e., play the game to a certain extent yet be true to ourselves..)

[Jumpingcactus]

@Former-Member I phoned lifeline around 3 weeks ago, much needed someone to talk too, they spent over an hour on the phone with me, he was patient and listened to me, he was such a great help to me I was filled with so much gratitude I started crying in appreciation. I won lotto when this man answered my call. He was amazing. 

[Shaz51]

@Former-Member, @Former-Member  we need to do one on the carers side too --- "How do you support yourself and your Love one  through the festive season"