sRe: Topic Tuesday // ADHD // Tuesday 22nd February, 7:00- 8:30PM AEDT

[Jynx]

@Bristle it's a real tough one hey. And it can be hard to have grief hit you so hard, unexpectedly - especially if others have the expectation of you that you ought to be 'over it' by now. 

Hugs, that is so tough. 💜

[Jynx]

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@Paperdaisy wrote:

Question 6: What are some tips or strategies for a) managing your ADHD and b) for friends or loved ones to know?

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a) Above all else – our BRAINS are simply WIRED DIFFERENTLY!! There’s nothing wrong with me, I’m not broken or weak and especially not LAZY!! For way more tips than I could ever collate into a succinct passage, the best resource I have found is the Youtube channel How to ADHD. It is honestly a life-saver!

b) Please be patient with us! We DO CARE! We might need extra prompting (context and recall) but it’s not for lack of trying. ADHDers are more prone to burn out, because often we feel pressured to keep up with our peers – even when it may seem we are capable of this, often it leaves us feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. Also, the phrase “Just try harder!” is probably the most dreaded words any ADHDer will hear. We are trying! It is not simply a matter of us being lazy/stubborn/irresponsible or not caring or not putting in enough effort! Often we are expending all the effort and energy we have just to survive. It’s not a lack of motivation, it is a fundamental difference in our brain chemistry. We often get shamed for it and then must also carry the shame - not only are we stressed about the symptoms, now we are also stressed about our inability to do literally anything about it.

[Bristle]

@Teej That sounds like its been a struggle, I am glad you have found some support to help deal with it.

A resource I found really helpful was KC Davis (strugglecare on tik tok) - she talks a lot about not assigning moral judgement to how life 'should' be

[Daisydreamer]

@Teej your honesty here is so valued, and I am sure that many people reading this can relate to how you are feeling Wearing that mask can get so heavy over time, and I can understand not feeling ready or able to remove a mask and be seen for who you are. I can really relate to this experience, and there are still days I hold a mask up- they really can get hard to hold. I hope you feel here in this community and with your psychiatrist, you can let the mask down even just a little and know you are seen, heard and validated for however you are feeling and however you feel you can show up on the day 

[Teej]

Question 6: What are some tips or strategies for a) managing your ADHD and b) for friends or loved ones to know?

I can’t answer  part B well.

For me it has been about researching lots to understand it and try to work on small parts at a time. 

I found the YouTube channel “how to adhd” so helpful. 
“The wall of awful” and “motivation bridge” were great. 
Here is the link to that channel

https://youtube.com/c/HowtoADHD

[Paperdaisy]

Thank you so much to everyone who has joined us tonight @Teej @Bristle @Shaz51 @Millieme @Bow @greenspace @Girlpower14 

This has been such a great discussion and I really appreciate the honesty from everyone here. You have all shared so much and I know there are many people who will benefit from reading this. @Jynx You have been amazing!!

Thank you for being here @Daisydreamer 

Have a great night everyone and thank you again for being here tonight 😊💝

[Shaz51]

B) for friends which we don't have any 

And for family to be supportive,  encouraging,  understanding @Paperdaisy , @Jynx 

[Teej]

Snap @Jynx   It has been a lifesaver

[Daisydreamer]

Thank you so much everyone!

@Jynx we are so lucky to have you here in the SANE team where we can continue to learn from your experience (as I call it Qualified by Experience) 🙂 

Take care everyone 

[Jynx]

@Teej Sounds like you're being really proactive about getting support!

I hope you can find some connections with other ADHDers who are more likely to accept you for who you are. And also, there's been so much growing awareness lately, so it's my hope that we will become far less stigmatised and can move into a world where people will understand our lived experience far better 💜