when is it time for hospital

[mudsum]

The thing is with trauma, depression, anxiety and types of mental illness the survivor never does deserve that damage. WE do NOT deserve the tortue that we are given. but we continue to fight becasue we are strong. We have not given up before.

We can do this.
you can do this.

[outlander]

I just want it to stop @mudsum .
I feel like its never going to end or change

[Pepsimax]

@outlander you want all the things that are happening to you to stop not for you

[NikNik]

Hi @outlander
I will pop you an email.

Nik

[outlander]

Not for you @Pepsimax ?
Iťs a never ending vicious cycle

[outlander]

Ok @NikNik

[Former-Member]

Mudsum rings true.I am constantly beating myself up, putting myself down,that's why I have had to shut out the world and put the bridge up like I'm in a fortress.Yesterday a relative messaged and praised me on taking care of my mother.It caused distressed because there's a large part of me that is full of guilt and a part like today can't handle the stress of it and would SC so another sibling can take on the responsibility.Another part wishes I had my own life and was free.

It will never be easy but I don't believe I will ever be ok.Preventing our SC is extremely difficult outlander but all we can do is try.

[outlander]

im.lower than low and then everynow and then i get this extremely overwhelming sense of anxiety
What the heck is going on!

[Former-Member]

I get the same anxiety outlander,hits like a tsunami at times like today with emotional pain that you can't bear.

[outlander]

Yeah i get the same guilt and thoughts anout caring sonetimes too @Former-Member i dont mind it and im happy to be there for him but a part of me wishes to take a break and havr a chance to go other things as well snd be a 'kid ' i suppose before coming back and resuming to be the wise person people think i am .
Its a scary vicious cycle

I wish something would let up
And yeah thats a good description: a tsunami of emotions
Its pretty bad. I dont even know how the anxiety can come in floods even when my depression is through the floor