Anyone feel like chatting? Coffee/Tea ☕💕

[Faith-and-Hope]

I'm good today @Former-Member .....

My painting is going well. The household is calm at the moment and I am out walking. It's a beautiful day. I am taking photos of boats that I am passing. They are making beautiful reflections in the water, and the sky is hazy. Think @Zoe7 would love this ....

How are you going ?

💜🌷

[Former-Member]

Ohhh, what's your painting of? I don't think I've ever seen any of your paintings. Have you put any of them up on here? I'd love to see them.
Your walk sounds wonderful. Just what one needs to cleanse the soul.
I'm okay. A bit fragile after therapy this morning. I'm in the library, but I don't really want to do any study. I think I just want to curl up in a little ball. I feel like such a failure being unwell.

[Shaz51]

Good afternoon @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Faith-and-Hope, @Former-Member, @Former-Member

@Faith-and-Hope paintings are in the far and away thread @Former-Member

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am painting a competition piece at the moment @Former-Member, so I can't share this particular one, but I have shared some private pieces on F&A thread .... might have to scroll back aways for some of them ....,

Sorry you're feeling low, but unwell is unwell, whether it's a cold, or something auto-immune, or mi ..... and none of them are a failure .... they just are .... and ought to be accepted on a sonewhat equal footing.

Hugz Hon ..., 💐💕 .... hope you pick up again soon.

[Faith-and-Hope]

How are you going @Former-Member ? 🌷💕

Αnd 5-HT .... ? 🌿💕

Sending hugzzzz ....... 🤗🤗💐💐💕💕

[Former-Member]

Hi @Faith-and-Hope,
I'm okay. Still a bit down from therapy and a bit scared to go back.
I've never been so open about stuff before. And I have no idea what he's going to make me do next week.
What do other people do in therapy????

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member It's cool you're being open. What scared you?
Doing chair work scares the crap out of me and a few other things. I'm not good at it. It's talking to a chair that represents a part of you. I can laugh now but it freaked me out when I started. Also kind of hate visualisations for two reasons. One I can't visualise but two it still brings out strong emotions even without seeing it. Does that help?

[Former-Member]

Heya beautiful @Former-Member, how are you today?

I've never been open before.
It's terrifying!!!! I've told him things I've never told anyone before. I'm so scared what he might say or make me say.
I know for him it's just another day at the office, but it's my deepest darkest secrets. And I'm not sure I trust him fully. And he knew I've been hearing voices, without me telling him. Makes me paranoid.
It's good to know others find it hard too.
I think I did visualisations in EMDR, it was horrific to say the least. So I totally get why you'd have strong emotions doing it.

[Former-Member]

I'm so sorry I'm in and out of the forums so much @Former-Member. I'm so 'Forrest Gump's box of chocolates these days'.....you never know what your going to get :face_with_rolling_eyes:. He sounds like he might be good for you though @Former-Member if he knows you and sounds like he gets you too. Want to know a secret? I've only just started telling my therapist the whole truth this year and I've been seeing her 5 years. I get so worried she'll judge me or change how she is with me but I haven't seen any of that so I guess it's building trust. You'll get there too. It's hard when it's all still new. I'm really proud of you for trying to build this relationship and help you. If he knows what's happening to you @Former-Member he has a really good understanding of you which I think is brilliant. It's kind of calming for me when that happens that someone actually knows me and gets me.

[Former-Member]

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

I hope things will settle soon for you.

Sorry I haven't been in touch all day. I try to mindlessly let the days pass and hope that friends and family drag me out. Had lunch with a friend today, but then needed to go home and rest. My head is killing me and I know the withdrawal symptoms well 😞

I feel like such a failure in all aspects of my life. I feel like I'm letting everybody down. And I know it is not true but it feels true to me. How can you not believe yourself without telling yourself that you're wrong and if you're wrong you're a failure anyway... I'm starting to feel the slide. I just hope I've learnt enough strategies by now, not to end up back in hospital. But that's where I would want to be. I understand now how it is a safe haven. When I wake at night there is no one there who knows me and knows my background and how to help me.