rough time

[Owlunar]

I am sure you would stand up for someone else @outlander - you know what it's like to be an outsider

My father was the local policeman - that could have gone either way for me - but with the kids at that school I was okay - even when I went to high school - but a couple of teachers thought I was a smarty-pants and I was but I thought if the teacher asked a question I needed to answer it if I could

Anyway - I think you are going through a time of change in your life - I have read it happening - I spend less time here than I used to and don't catch up on all the threads but I do read a bit here and there - your life isn't easy - anyone whose life is too easy won't learn much I think - and that is not our business

Some people are pure aholes and they will learn or not - but that's not our problem

I will be here more often now the seasons are changing - I have been alone for days except for a couple of times when I have had the chance to chat with someone - but when I spend time here it really feels as if I am talking to people and say and read more than the trivial and the small talk

Dec

[outlander]

i think many of us here know what its like to be an outsider @Owlunar which is a shame. im glad you didnt cop slack due to your fathers work! couldve went both ways.

my life is forever changing and it gets really tough. im in the middle of trauma therapy and releiving it atm so maybe after that parts done itll improve.. 

itll be good seeing you around more. i like chatting to you about well pretty much anything in general really. 

[Owlunar]

I can tell you about my first day at the primary school @outlander

Dad took us wearing his police uniform and of course all the kids turned around to stare and we heard the head-master call them back to attention - at assembly - it took me a moment to find that old word

I was in Grade 4 - huge class full of children - some were migrants from Europe - I was given a seat and I heard a whisper behind me "She's the policeman's daughter" and I thought "Oh great - the whole school knows - what next?"

Next was mental arithmetic - like everyone else I put my hands on my head and the teacher revealed the secret questions and we had ten minutes to work it out in our heads - sheesh - that was easy - I had already learned that.

When we finished we put our hands back on our heads and the teacher came around and marked our work and then the whishper "She got them all right!" - oh gosh - what else?

At playtime some of the girls came to me and said "All the best girls play on the Jungle Jim - are you coming?" - I was so relieved to be accepted and whatever it was that made this the case I will never know I am sure it was not my perfect score at arithmetic but there were girls who did not accept me - and this was fine with me because my father also told us later who we should not play with. It was never easy being the policeman's kids and I know my brother never have it easy

I like chatting with you too - it doesn't matter what  - I am taking my knees to bed soon - I think the only way to get the inflamation to settle is to rest them

Trauma therapy - I don't think I am having that but my new therapist wants to know about my past and this brings back the bad parts - mostly my mother and my son - well - not him so much as my being alone with him - trauma - yes - but after stretching myself to the limit in the session I come home and have a coffee and cuddle my cat and tell her all about it - 

I can tell you one thing though - my brother and I thought it was fun living at the police station - the things that happened and what was my father thinking taking his young family there?

I will never know

Dec

[Bella1978]

@outlander

hey sweets, how are you? sorry has taken me so long to get back to you. busy afternoon!

hows your hand? has the pain subsided at all?

i ended up seeing mum this arvo, was meant to be a short visit but she wanted me to get her some sweets from the shop lol ... she has me wrapped around her little finger I tell ya! haha ... i got her some sweets then went back and we had a cuppa together which was nice. she was pretty drowsy but they have had to give her something to help her sleep so no doubt that is why she is drowsy. while i was at the shops for her though i got what i needed for the house! win win!

how was your day luv? did you get up to much?

xxxx

[outlander]

wow @Owlunar well thats quite interesting. not many have a police officer walk them in now do they!

sometimes its hard having those sorts of families isnt it. glad you got through it ok though. youve come out well in your character. im not sure if yours is trauma therapy either. mine jsut basically told me to tell my entire dog story or all of what i could remember and then pick it back up again next session again. she and i both cried at our last session. was a very hard one but im hoping that ill come out the other side better than what i am now. 

can you elevate your legs abit? so your laying more on your back but with a few pillows under your knees? that sometimes helps too

it has been loveley having this catchup we havent really spoken in  a long while. 

[outlander]

hey @Bella1978 im ok tonight, and no pain hasnt subsided but it didnt help from earlier today. i see my nurse in the am so might meantion it to her as well. nah i didnt get up to alot really. just had to do stuff with mum and kids again and then pop got home and with his visior as well so bakc up on 'duty' again. but ive got a coping plan in place and its working well so im going ok. 

aww arent you loveley! hows your mum travelling besides drowsy? is she improving a little bit being in there? how are you?

and no need to apologise at all!

[Bella1978]

@outlander

im sorry to hear your still in so much pain - definitely mention it to your nurse tomorrow luv.

is it better now that your pop is home? i know you were a bit worried about being on your own. did your pop have a nice easter? aaw you're such a good big sis! *big gold star for you!*

mum still seems down at times, which is to be expected, but i can definitely see an improvement. one day at a time. plus she is on antibiotics for the uti so as that clears up i think she will be feeling even more better. i was speaking to another one of the nurses today and she said she used to work with dementia patients - when they started displaying behaviours out of the ordinary, the first thing they would do would be to test them for a UTI!

luv, mum is so funny. i get there and she asks me to go the shops - which i did. i decided to get myself a savoury muffin while i was out to have with her, and the leftover bring home for dinner. she wanted a sweet with custard in it so naturally i got her something with custard in it. little bugger wanted the rest of my muffin though 😞 lol ... and she gave me the custard sweet to take home haha ... i'll buy 2 next time ! she's a funny little vegemite. 

how are you feeling this evening luv?

[outlander]

i was more worried about being home alone due to safety reasons (internally not externally) @Bella1978 its ok hes back but i didnt get a break i was hoping for. its just been one thing after another. yep pop had a great time away which im glad of. he brought his brother down as well and guess what started- they are talking about that damn bed again. i walked away and put headphones in.

poor bugger with that uti, i hope it clears soon. shes prob feeling like crap as well. oh lol funny thing next time yes buy 2 of them! 

did you do something nice for yourself today? some self care stuff?

im ok tonight. how are you?

[Owlunar]

It has been great tonight @outlander

I do have to go to bed and elevate my legs on the extra pillows - that is the only thing to do

Hopefully we can catch soon - I have enjoy this evening

Dec

[outlander]

i hope it helps @Owlunar goodnight i hope you sleep well