SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

[Owlunar]

Cripes @Adge -

that is such toxic behaviour - please don't feel guilty about throwing that our - yes - that kind of hoarding has a way of finding a good home for something and my ex and I used to have fights about it

People would give him junk and he would bring it to our house and I would refuse to allow it in the house insisting that someone was just giving it to him -  to give it a good home - which wouldn't be my home

It's so painful that - and a lot worse than just hoarding - which my ex did - trying to provide a good home for these things - but passing them on which helps no one

I'm so sorry - this must be a heart-ache for you - yeah - she could have thrown it away without wasting money on the postage

I'm so sorry Adge

Dec

[Owlunar]

It's good to see you too @Former-Member

Catch me up with your news when you have the chance

Dec

[Adge]

Thanks @Owlunar I'm sorry to hear that you've had to live with that hoarding behaviour too.

I grew up in it. My childhood house was unlivable (& caused us physical injuries), because of the hoarding.

It's taken me decades to try to come to terms with that behaviour - even though I haven't lived with them for almost 30 years.

The compulsive belief that "We can't throw this (or anything) out, because it might be useful someday" - even though there is no room to move (in the house), & nowhere to put it...

Adge

[Appleblossom]

Cheers @Former-Member @Awpgirl @TAB @Owlunar @Adge

I had missed you @Former-Member Glad you had christmas with your son.

[TAB]

Cheers to you too @Appleblossom 😸

[Owlunar]

Hi @Adge

My ex was a hoarder but I didn't allow it in the house - it was in our sheds and garage though and in the roof space too I think

I'm not sure it cause our marriage to break down but we had lots of fights about it and a lot of stuff was just dumped into the rubbish and once I even threw some into the land fill

I hate it that you had to grow up in it though - esp if there was bad food - it's a serious health problem I know

Dec

[Former-Member]

Hi Appleblossom, I haven't had much to say since totalled my car, and now at mum & dads - don't sit long 😕 mum gets cranky at me if play with phone / go onlong while sitting with them watching tv. Last night she snapped at me "is that thing all you care about?" I never know how to reply. So not on much. Didn't sleep all last night but just having acreat before lunch (round 3)

@Owlunar, I'm OK'ish thanks, very tired. Family dynamics getting tense wih no WILL or EPOA. My sister was appointed guardian over mums medical affairs the day I arrived (what a slap onbthe face since I'm on the floor, cleaning & caring & using my 30yrs nursing experience...) and she rarely visits (though only one hour away) and dont do dises or helps practically. She took much of mums aunaments last week. My sister told me shes gonna go for dads 'power of attorney' even though he has stated several times he'd like me as his carer, and apparently she's coming to visit today. It really hurt me - not even being included in the decisions at all, treated invisible, just a cindarella slave.l, oh my ego, ouchy 😕i got so angry I couldn't sleep all night. Mum doesn't remember signing anything, dad officially has dementure now, & mum has terminal cancer (any time now) but taking control of dads key cards etc. All very messy. I'm creating a folder of papers laying around the house, bills, contract renewals,... And covertly creating a folder for them. If I don't end up with control of things then I'll at least have the paperwork available to pass on and move on.

[Faith-and-Hope]

💐💜 @Former-Member .....

[Former-Member]

💜 @Faith-and-Hope
Haven't caught up / found how you're travelling, good I hope 🙂

[Faith-and-Hope]

Not too bad @Former-Member ..... have made a mental shift, as you have with your mum, and it’s making a difference.

💜