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Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

My family (childhood) house has just been sold. It's the house that Dad still lived in, before he died.

As @Smc mentioned, it's turned into a bit of a bungfight.

My sister in law got in Mum's ear, when it does not concern her - & she knows well that Mum (who has major anxiety) over-reacts to things said to her.

M told Mum to keep $350K aside for herself - so now Mum is keeping most of the entire amount ($500K) for herself.

This breaks Mum's promise to share the amount equally amongst 4 of us (siblings). It also means that Mum will now lose her pension (she knows this).

Mum & Dad were separated for 8 years, before he died (they did not live together) - but because they were not divorced, the house went to her (she has her own house).

Mum thinks nothing of breaking her promises, but this is a big one.

I could legally dispute it (apparently), but I don't have the money for lawyers - or the energy & determination to do that.

Adge

 

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

Hi @Former-Member and everyone... I'm going OK - haven't accumulated much lately. My problem is I can't say no when someone says I've got a such and such do you want it? So of course I say yes. At least it all goes into the garage and not the house. I've got rid of a few things lately so the house isn't looking too bad. I'm still on track to have the fireplace clear by winter so I can use it again.

Sorry for what happened to you @Adge - people need to be so clear in their wills about who gets what. Six months before my Mum died my sister got in her ear and had her change her will to give her almost everything because she cried poor. All her problems in life are her own doing and she has always lived an extravagant lifestyle beyond her means and relied on others to help her out. She got in first after she died and took everything of value and me and my daughters ended up with nothing even though she knew there was jewellery that Mum wanted my girls to have. By the time I got into the house all the step children and hangers-on had been through it as well and all I got was a mess to clean up. What really devastated me was my possessions included my artworks and childhood stuff had been thrown out just to be spiteful. I could have gone to lawyers and disputed the will as the previous will was completely different but it would have cost a fortune and it wasn't about the money more that me and my girls got nothing after Mum had promised them things while she was still alive. The same jewellery has now probably been flogged off at the local cash converters. I've now completely removed a lot of people from my life after that and I realise I'm better off without them. OK sorry about the rant, everyone have a good night.

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

I'm so sorry to hear that @Former-Member That's really not fair, particularly when your daughters were promised things that had sentimental value.

Yes it's a bit like that for me. I received nothing from the house, even though it was cluttered full of 40 years worth of stuff.

So the money promised was Dad's positive legacy (or gift). Now we're not getting that either.

Adge

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

Hey peoples...I'm back.

My week at my parents' house was one of the better ones so far. I've mentioned how we've been trying to insist that Mum finds something for us to take away from her aged care room whenever we bring something in. I took in some patchwork fabrics that she's been wanting for ages, which I eventually came across during sorting out, and she willingly sorted through her fabrics stash and gave me some that she'd decided she wasn't going to use. She also passed some on to a friend who was visiting at the time. Said friend is wanting the fabric to make pillowcases for newly arrived grandkids, so those bits will go to very good use.

I'm still feeling really overwhelmed by the amount of stuff in the house, but am maybe starting to see a bit of progress. A cousin of mine who plays "taxi" for me while I'm there was commenting that she could see a difference, so that's a bit encouraging.

I spent most of this trip focusing on a couple of large cupboards in the hallway, and have tossed out a lot of recipes Mum had saved from magazines, and some of her stash of jars saved for jam making. Have kept a biggish boxful of the nicer ones because I'm a keen jam maker myself, but some of those may still end up in the recycling bin. Have also sorted out the full bottles of jam and relish, and we won't need to make or buy plum and raspberry jam for a few years, or orange marmelade, or tomato relish... Those as such I don't mind, because they keep for ages, and I could use some of it up in recipes. Poached orange chicken or pork sounds like a plan.

A lot of the recipe books from the cupboard won't be kept, but I want to give my sister a chance to glance over them before they go. We both want to keep hold of some old and very tattered books that have been in the family for ages, and would date back to early-mid 1900s. 

Mum had a huge stockpile of facewashers, handtowels and teatowels, so I'm leaving some in the kitchen drawer and towel cupboard to use while I'm there, and the rest are getting boxed up. Some will go into the garage sale stack, some I'll keep to use myself. 

I've brought a smallish suitcase full of stuff back with me. Mostly household breakables and bits of fabric that I'd like to use. Now my challenge at this end is to see if I can find an equivalent amount here that's either rubbish. or would be better passed or sold on to someone else. Bigger challenge will be doing likewise to the equivalent of the small truckload we want to bring back here in a couple of months...???

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

My mr is bringing boxes full of stuff out of a storage unit we have got here for sorting, using, or passing on.  We have had enough rows about being flooded with stuff to sort across the last few years that he now knows better than to bring it al, out at once and land it in a big pile inside the front door or the lounge room .....

One box at a time I can manage .....

 

Well done @Smc.  My Dad is trying to work on his horde, I am pleased to say.

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

Hmmmm.... I know in my experience this is a real problem. And a bit of a circular one too. Overwhelmed mind = hard to see the next step.

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Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

@Smc @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Former-Member @1stepup61 @Determined @Former-Member *waves

Are you home now @utopia? Hope things are a little brighter for you.

Slow going here, am a few days behind here on 3 things a day but have spotted a few bits I can deal with after tea tonight to help catch up.

@Adge - you may qualify for legal aid.

https://www.legalaid.wa.gov.au/LegalAidServices/applyingforLegalAid/Pages/Applyingfor.aspx

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

Thanks very much for that link @Former-Member (no I still don't know how to do links myself)...

I'm looking at it, to see if there's a chance.

Adge

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

@Former-Member. Going home tomorrow.
Will have to make a big effort to make cleaning / decluttering part of my daily routine
So I should be on this post more often in the future

Re: SPRING-Clean Declutter - Need Help

Well, i took x4 big garbage bags of stuff to Charity last week. Friday I've organised doing mums wardrobe with an aunt. Hope shes well enough. The real estate back home took another through yesterday, reminded me its hard to see the house behind all the stuff - my fault it wont sell...
Oh no, something's in my room, tberes a rat somewhere, i've spotted him once & he got into my peanuts yesterday, what if he bites me? Help