Life can be a Pain

[Owlunar]

Hi @outlander

Yes - there have been a lot of disconnected things happening in my life lately - I try not to add them up but they are there

As things are with you - I know you have taken the loss of your horse job hard - as would I - well actually - I find cleaning the cat's litter tray enough - mucking out after horses is a matter of taste - as would be pen-pushing and bean counting which is what I used to do most of the time

One man I worked for only asked me for a cup of tea a couple of days before he decided I would be happier elsewhere - which was right - I do not feel as if someone employed as the company accountant needs to know without being told that the boss wants a cup of tea - botheration - if I could get my own coffee he could get his tea 

But still - losing a job is painful

January is half over - I left a message at the pain clinic that I would be interested if the new social worker started up the social group again - and I feel like playing cards - I will go up to the local community centre and see what they have happening 

But then - I did not know I was socially isolated until someone described me as such - I rarely have time on my hands - I don't get bored by maybe I can go out more 

I hope you are okay Outlander - I know you have been watching a series on TV - I actually love doing this - watching a series on TV and going the whole season at once

Thinking of you 

Dec

[outlander]

everything adds up @Owlunar even the small stuff makes it into the bigger picture so i hope things do settle down for you esp the pain. it sounds like the balls in your court though with the pain. people are helping which is really good. your plans for a social life sounds really good to, i hope somehwere local has something you can join in 

yeh loosing the job was hard and has given me more thinking tim which isnt good considering i was in hospital but i dont want that job. being a carer is enough. now i have a bit more me time and can maybe study again when i can think better

[Shaz51]

Hello @Owlunar, been thinking of you today

hope you are ok my friend

I have arthritis that keeps moving around the body giving me lots of aches and pains , finding out that it it from my kidney disease where instead of all the toxic going into the toilet , it is going back into the body , so when the urea acid and the creatinine goes to high it affects your body , muscles, ect

sending you hugs my friend

[Owlunar]

Hi @Shaz51

I'm sorry you have all these toxins - creatinine - stays in your body and gives you so much pain - you have enough in your life indeed without your own body giving you strife

Would you consider a transplant? I would happily be a donor if someone could use a kidney and that person was important to me - unlikely to ever be the case  and I am a registered organ donor

Yet when I think about it myself I don't feel I would be an organ recipient - it has to be an individual and considered choice for donor and recipient - and not an easy choice either - unless we have passed on and are done with our organs

I haven't been feeling all that well - I have been walking properly for the first time for however long - my right knee will probably always be stiff with the arthritis I am prone to - but since my arthroscopy I am walking properly and this is causing pain in my hip - probably bursitis - and tomorrow I am having an ultrasound - 

I guess you know the feeling and ask yourself if what you have already had isn't really enough - getting older is far more than just a number

Thanks for the call-out - I had a lot on my mind also - about my toxic sister and my rellies who are ill and I saw my psychologist today and yes - it is a big deal for me to take things into my own hands and fly interstate and let my rellies know I am there and I want to see them - I have chosen to be alone for so long now - having been pushed away from the family - it's a common story here - but I have learned to prefer it - I have a history of non-confrontation and prefer my life alone but ah yeah - this is the really tough bit coming up

My therapist wants me to write something about my sister - ahhhhhhhhhhhhh - I can do without her but maybe I have to establish relationships with other members of my extended family so I will hear with the oldies die off rather than not hear because my sister doesn't tell me - I haven'f figured that out yet

So regardless - I am sorry your kidney is not functioning enough to keep you healthy and hope that maybe dialysis can help - or something can help - I have orthopaedic problems and I can assure you that I prefer the devil I know - maybe you get that idea - I hope something works for you

Thanks Shaz

Dec

[outlander]

@Owlunar ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[Owlunar]

Thanks @outlander

I haven't looked around yet to see what other people have been doing over the last few days - I do become very introspective at times and find my life goes on whether I get my computer out or not

Boredom is not my problem - I have a short story about my epic moment of boredom during a philosophy lecture when I had done all the reading the lecturer suggested the previous week and all he did was tell us what we should have read - sheesh - that was a tough hour - the chair I was on got harder and harder - 

But now - I am pretty busy and think a whole lot and I find I have been thinking about my sister too much - and I read my previous post and what I wrote about her there is pretty much enough - make other connections in my family - good solution - but not that easy either

I think of you though

Dec

[Shaz51]

sending you lots of tender hugs @Owlunar 

thankyou the specialist says I am a long way from going on the kidney Dialosis

how are you today xoxo

[Owlunar]

Hi @Shaz51@outlander@Faith-and-Hope@utopia@Former-Member@Adge

I had an ultrasound on my hip today and the results - I have bursitis in my hip and next week I have to have an injection into my hip - the spot that gets the needle is called the bursa - and the problem - let's see if I can spell this beauty - trochanteric bursitis - 

Frankly - I could do without this - I feel as if I have had enough but life does go on - and it does go on and on and on

I saw my therapist yesterday - my feelings about my sister are giving me a hard time - i could do without that too

At least January is passing quickly - it usually lasts for much longer than 31 days - but I have been down to the beach a few times and I always love that - for a long time I lived very close to the beach - now it's a bit further but I can still get there

And I just got up to let Companion Cat in and after a hot and humid day with have had rain and it's really steaming out there - and it's 8.21 pm - 

At least the weather has been warm - 

Dec

[outlander]

Hi @Owlunar

sorry for the delay, its been a stressful day with pops specialist appointment.

Thats ok ,lfe does go on but its nice to see you here either way.

Lectures can be boring cant they. Its tough not having your sisters support or even really a relationship. Itll be nice if you could form a siterhood again but sometimes its not to be...

ahh sorry to hear about the bursitis, those needles are suppose to be horrible! I hope its not too bad for you but might be nice to have some emotional support or a stress ball to squeeze just in case.

Im glad your seeing your therapist, I hope your finding her helpful and getitng some of your thoughts and things sorted out as well.

[utopia]

Wow @Owlunar you got rain! Haven't seen that for a few weeks now. Everything is brown and needing a drink of water here.
Were you and your therapist able to sort out some things about your sister? Did it help?
Sorry to hear about the bursitis. My friend has it and gets alot if relief after the needle. I hopeyou eexperience that also.
My son comes home on Tuesday from his holiday to Nepal. I can't wait to see him and hear all about his trip. I've missed him.
Saw my psychiatrist yesterday. He took me off my anxiety med and increased my AD. Will seeif that helps me start 'feeling' things again.