Life can be a Pain

[Shaz51]

ohhh @Owlunar , hugs my second mum 

[Historylover]

Well that must have been quite a shock @Owlunar.  Lucky you didn't get burned.  My neighbour's hot water system burst recently and she woke up to an entire unit in flood.  I helped her suck it up with my carpet shampooer but a lot of damage had been done overnight.  It affected the plaster walls to the extent that a considerable amount of work had to be done there, flooring replaced, kitchen rebuilt etc.  It must have cost a considerable sum but the fear was that mould would start to grow and cause health problems.  So I hope your work of drying it out is prompt.  And I hope your shoulder was not too badly affected.  Didn't need that, did you?

I am tough about the problems I have @Owlunar but it simply shouldn't happen.  Shouldn't happen!  It is socially unacceptable for people to treat others like this and it is rampant in our society.  It is no wonder that people's personalities are warping from the distress we are subjected to, while some conclude that they are suffering social anxiety!!  Me too!!!  Keep people away from me!  Teach them some manners!! I am so angry.  People commit suicide from being subjected to behaviour like this, so I feel nothing less than absolute scorn for them.  Total disdain.

Anyway another week is on its way.  I'm not up on the lockdown situation.  I don't think I want to know. Still without a kitchen.

Take care.  

[Zoe7]

What an ordeal @Owlunar ...but what a great way to deal with it also. It is good to see the funny side of such things - we can't change them but we can control how we get through them. So great the plumber could come so quickly too and that you will have some help with the rest of the clean up. I hope also that the pain in your shoulder passes quickly - you certainly do not need that ongoing again. Goodnight Dec - need an early night here. 

[BlueBay]

OMG @Owlunar  that must have been horrible.  I hope it's all sorted now, but how is the carpet, still wet?

that's not good you hurt your shoulder, hoping you're not in too much pain. And glad that a plumber was sent quickly, that's good service!!

Pls take care Dec xxxxooo

[Owlunar]

Hi @Historylover 

I read your other posts carefully - I have not experienced such antisocial behaviour myself but I do know what you mean - after spending years at 3 different churches of my denomination in this area I left - for personal reasons - I guess things just added up and for different reasons I had enough - I think I could have been more passive about things but I just don't hang around where I am not comfortable. I would like to play cards but I am not comfortable with the in-talk and politics of the local aged-citizens. Who knows why? I am comfortable alone I think

But I do hear you - maybe things are worse out there now than they were when I was employed - I took early retirement over 25 years ago now and I do recall there were unpleasant people about - some people go out of their way to be nasty I think. I was pretty popular in most of the places I went to - but yes - a few nasty people can make things smutty - I guess as I am older I like it less

I don't know what to suggest - sometimes people are just having their say about things and I can leave it there but feel free to share - if you want to get out and about in the community then it is really hard to find a place where the atmosphere is conducive to returning

I'm glad you got your new computer - I didn't know people got a free mouse with a new computer - I have had a lot of computers since I first bought a word processor to write my minor thesis back in 1991 - I have had to buy a new mouse from time to time - with the lock-down I would feel okay about getting something on-line now. I've been doing on-line shopping a bit lately and it gets easier each time

I'm really sorry to hear that you don't have a proper kitchen - that has to be down-right inconvenient - I don't know how you manage with that - or rather - without it

All the best - I hope things look up for you soon - I am sure that therapist you had has made relationships harder for you - that was not a good scene for anyone

Dec

[Historylover]

Hello @Owlunar.  I haven't experienced such anti-social behaviour for a long time - but it used to be rampant in my experience.  Such two-facedness, insincerity, back-stabbing and disrespect.  I have now left the club.  I am going to take time to think.  There is absolutely nothing I could have done differently.  I really don't know what to say about the whole situation.  I should have expected it really.  It was rampant in the club - and jobs - I was in decades ago.  I just think men have forgotten how to conduct themselves in the presence of women, and if they conduct themselves with such disrespect for women even among themselves, they simply aren't suited to our society anyway.  

To be honest - I truly don't know what to make of people.  

Anyway - yes the new computer is good.  Perhaps the free mouse I got may have come with my first computer which was a tower set-up and I may have carried it over to my previous, follow-up lap top.  Perhaps I had forgotten.

The kitchen situation is difficult.  It has been a month now and is less than half done.  My diet is becoming seriously affected and I am consoling myself with chocolate.  Too much.  So much work still to do here re painting, electrical, tiling etc.  

You'll have to excuse this short response @Owlunar.  I am still swinging from feeling good to falling into despair.  After a night in despair, I spent a good day - but here it comes again.  It's that frequent.  My situation just keeps resurfacing in my consciousness and I respond with depair.  How lucky you are to have loved ones.  

I see a psychiatrist on Thursday.  I am terrified.  Terrified that he will be untrustworthy too.  That is what I am anticipating.  I have seen how they cover for each other while presenting as honourable.  I am just terrified I will be lulled into a false sense of security again even if I am fore-armed.  

I have to take a break from this re-hash.  Take care, @Owlunar.  Sending best wishes.

I hope your clean-up is completed from your burst tap.  Lucky you weren't injured.

[Anastasia]

Hugs to both of you wonderful souls @Historylover @Owlunar 🌻🌄💚💛

[Jynx]

@Historylover seems like you have quite a lot on your plate - and when it starts to impact your most basic functions like eating, it can really knock everything else into higher gear too. 

I really hear you in regards to feeling nervous about your upcoming appt. with a new psych. Seems like you've had some really bad experiences with the MH system. That is rough, and you definitely aren't alone there. But there are some wonderfully kind folks within the MH system who are compassionate and caring. Sometimes I advise people to prefer a psychologist or counsellor for more personal care, and only look to psychiatry for things pertaining to medications. It can be tricky finding the right person, I will keep my fingers crossed this one is someone you can build trust with 

[Historylover]

The trouble is, @Jynx, I consider this problem beyond the scope or understanding of a psychologist.

I would have preferred to see a psychologist because of my own previous experience and that which I have observed of others', but I consider it would have been a waste of time and money.  I could get as much help from discussing my problems with a caring stranger at the bus stop, in my opinion. 

I don't want to talk, or engage in the latest procedure considered beneficial.  I want help which works!  I want to understand why my ex-psychiatrist did this to me.  And I want to survive the questioning in a better condition than before asking it.

My last 2-session experience with a psychiatrist left me doubting my sanity - which was his intention - and which I have never experienced in my life before.  It was terrifying.  

I get compassion and caring here, @Jynx.  It's free and it's genuine.

Forgive me if I repeat this from an early post, but it is at the core of this situation:

I have mentioned in a previous post that I have lived among the homeless - not because I was homeless, but because when I became too ill to look after myself when my physical health broke down from the stress I had endured, I asked a social worker if I could get board and lodging somewhere.  That was where she referred me!  A residence for 300, mostly men, mostly alcoholic.  Me!  It made me realize how people's lives go from bad to worse because of the intentions of people purporting to 'help'.  Role-playing 'caring' isn't enough.  Actually knowing what they are doing is essential, as is following through to ensure success and taking the consequences and fixing it if it doesn't - if that even needs to be said.  I am pleased to have learned that lesson.

The team of approximately 6 - 8 psychologists and social workers who had offices in the building were moving elsewhere, leaving those lives in utter despair.  My ex-psychiatrist told me to go there, and with his support and guidance in the background, we took 300 lives in total ruin and made a very large 'tribe' of supportive, kindred spirits.  I know what proper guidance can do.  My ex-psychiatrist trained me.  But he didn't train me to identify his apparent duplicity.  And that is what I need to come to terms with. 

I need someone who knows more about psychiatry, human behaviour and sociology than I do.  I don't want to feel that I have to explain my explanations, to talk down to them so that they understand.  I need someone worthy of my trust.  I need help and I need it desperately.  I'm fighting for my life.

[Anastasia]

Hello @Historylover 

I'm not able to add any "wise words". In truth I have none. But I do see and hear you sweetheart and I'm truly sorry, you are and ever have been in such a sh1tty situation. Really mean it when I say I hope for the help you need 🙏❣️