Grief & loss - may be triggering

[Adge]

@Former-MemberThanks.

Is there any way that you can give me a link to that anxiety thread? I still have much trouble finding threads on the site.

I don't think it's rubbish at all, I just have great difficulty in being aware of grief or physical sensations in my body, etc.

My work hours (& location) change on a daily basis, I'm only told at 4pm the afternoon before who I'm with, where, & for how long.

This is very stressful, & makes scheduling personal (& support) appointments extremely difficult - almost impossible. So many of my appointments have been cancelled due to this on-going situation.

I rarely work over 30 hours per week, but the travel involved is enormous - it's located a long distance from me, & also involves driving clients around for hours during the shift. I often drive about 100 kilometres a day, which is far too much driving for me.

I am trying to apply for (& get) work with fixed working hours (routine), that is much closer to home - yet the support appointment that is for assisting me with job applications, keeps getting cancelled due to my changing (unknown) work hours. A catch 22 you might say.

Good luck with your GP appointment, I'm thinking of you & wishing you well.

Adge

[Former-Member]

OK @Adge, I'll try. There's a few threads. Also, dare i suggest you self care better, make appointments (once a week) and tell them you have made other plans, or have an important apt you can't change (details none of their business) and simply dictate you simply are not available that morning. I reckon one morning or afternoon a week is more than fair. You gotta stand up for yourself. I remember giving the boss my all, putting the job first, even as a single mother - until He expected me to work Christmas morning. He knew i was a sole parent with no family help... It was hard putting my job on the line to save him a few bucks on a casual staff - pig! The job doesn't bury ya children for you when you're work exacerbates MI & ya parenting abilities, or hold ya hand in old age. Your health comes first Adge. Looking back I should not have given 1/2 as much to the job as I did then. They will use you up and throw you away. In my experience anyway. Sorry I'm a bit fragile atm and about all that. Do be your own best friend and advocate. I'll come back with some links. Still learning how to do this myself, i havrnt got any feedback if the other links I've posted have worked but they are coming up blue, so do let me know.

Hope you sleep well tonight 🙂

[Former-Member]

OK @Adge, here goes, I've put something together for you. Hope its helpful 🙂



This is the 'anxiety' discussion thread I started recently:
https://saneforums.org/t5/Our-experience-stories/anxiety/m-p/232875/highlight/true#M37452

Hope this works, this is the link to cancer councils website (online resources) for you to find and listen to exercises - the Mindfulness Meditations & Relaxation exercises listing.
https://www.cancercouncil.com.au/901/cancer-information/general-information-cancer-information/compl...

On saneforum there's a lot of thread discussions on anxiety, and grief etc, that might interest you... on this page - If you can locate the 'SEARCH BAR' (or tap the magnifying glass) on your screen and search topics of interest, you can find anything, it will bring up discussions going back years.

The forum factsheets are very informative, you'll need to go to homepage on the website for that (that three little bars at the top of the page).
Here's a couple of links to Forums factsheets that may interest you:
https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides

Here's a couple to save you looking

Anxiety
https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/anxiety-disorder

Trauma events (your surgery Adge)
https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/traumatic-events

Mindfulness (meditation)
https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/mindfulness

Bereavement (only found bereavement related to suicide. Funeral homes & websites have some good resources on bereavement). B
https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides/has-someone-close-to-you-died-by-sui...

Hope some of this works and or makes sense. Will help where I can. Computers or high tech is hard if ya not use to it. Keep practising, were all the same.

Lapses ❤❤❤

[Former-Member]

Some Grief threads:

https://saneforums.org/t5/Our-experience-stories/Let-s-talk-about-Grief-amp-Loss/m-p/121247/highligh...

https://saneforums.org/t5/Our-experience-stories/Loss-and-Grief/m-p/186605/highlight/true#M33428

https://saneforums.org/t5/Something-s-not-right/grief-and-the-aniversary-of-a-loved-one/m-p/197648/h...

[Adge]

Gee @Former-Member it does sound like you've been through the mill with work in the past.

I don't know how to do links myself - I've never worked it out.

Yes self care absolutely - I have stood up for myself & have set firmer boundaries on many fronts.

I ruled out early starts (6am) & late (night time) shifts - because it was impacting on my health. I had to fill out a form to reduce my availability to do that.

I've still got a long way to go with boundaries & self-care.

Oh I totally agree with what you said about centrelink (earlier post) by the way - they scare the. ... out of me (sorry to say I hate the way they operate).

They cheated me out of $1000's of rightful entitlements years ago - because I wasn't game to fight them over it.

Have a good night I'm so late for bed...

Adge

[Former-Member]

Good night @Adge
you make me smile 🙂

[Adge]

@Former-MemberI'm glad I helped you to smile.

I can't seem to find much to smile about recently - I'm,not wanting to be morose, I do look for a positive focus, & things (thoughts) to "perk me up".

That was an impressive list of links (threads) that you posted earlier. Wow! I've so goto work out how to do that...

My back is so sore, & my neck muscles are so tense. It's all the driving (picking up clients etc) that does it, & the stress of unknow schedules (& driving to unknown places).

I've been limping around with a sore ankle since I got home 1 hour ago.

Adge

[Former-Member]

Oh dear @Adge, you sound "in the wars" sore back, neck, ankle, work stress... feel for you. Wish I could find something funny to pick you up.
Did you try one of the links? Do they work? How I do it is by going to the page then selecting & copy the address bar the top of the page, then paste it here. Hope it works. I'm using a mobile phone, not desktop.
What have you been doing tonight? I had a big day picking up & delivery for work. Lovely country drive though.
Do you have any hobbies? Pets? So proud of you for sticking with the job. Hope you get a good sleep tonight. I have an early start so hope to nod off soon. Watching 'Heartbeat' which settles my mind. 🍁🌿

[Adge]

Hi @Former-Member I just collapsed last night. It's like that most evenings.

I do early starts too.

Hobbies are not very active at the moment - canaries, finches & some parrots.

Gardening & plants - garden unkempt. 2 cats.

Off to work. Thanks.

Adrian

[Former-Member]

Sorry you're so shattered in the evenings. Not gos +Crashing early helps. Hope youre not full time?. You might have a touch of the winter blues too..nor fun. I love that you have small birds, I live birds. But allergy to cats. Try get into.hobbies a little bit at a time (: