Topic Tuesday // Talking to your parents about your mental health // Tues. 5 June 7pm AEST

[mindboggle18]

@Gina-Bell

I know I'm not alone in this situation. Is it okay to give handouts to my parents about mental health stuff? I know they are trying their best. But at some point a part of me doesn't actually want them to know because they are half the problem that has caused me to struggle with my mental health and part of the problem. A part of me is angry at them and keeping them out of the loop is hurting them so I think " good, well you stuffed me up so now it's  my chance to stuff you up"

[JessieB]

Great responses everyone. I love hearing about your own expereiences.

Another point that i've prepared:

My parent/s are a part of the reason why I’m struggling. 

I had many issues with my mother during my teenage years. She was suffering with her own mental health issues that were never openly discussed within the family.

I found it extremely hard to express my thoughts and feelings to either of my parents at that time in my life, as I was scared of their reaction and I was scared of getting into trouble.

This can sometimes be a common struggle for many younger people, especially due to the stigma that still surrounds mental health.

Fortunately, I had an opportunity to reach out to another trusted adult that was in my life. Although it wasn’t my own parents, having someone to speak to, and the support of a trusted adult gave me the confidence to speak up about how I was feeling, and also gave me the strength to sit down and have a chat with my parents.

The trusted adult who supported me was a friend of the family. At first, I thought that confiding in this person would put strain on their relationship with my parents, but it was actually the opposite – both of my parents understood the reasons behind my decision, and it actually brought our family closer together.

Q: Who else is in your network for support? And do you have the confidence to speak with them?

[Gina-Bell]

@mindboggle18 I think its completely up to you what you're comfortable with them knowing, but as @JessieB has said, having your parents on board can be an important part of your recovery. 

I think educational handouts, website, or whatever else, are totally ok to give your parents. 

This is also why having them come into an appointment with a doctor or counsellor can be helpful as they can do the explaining. 

And I hear you on the difficulties around bringing them into the journey, when you feel hurt by them. That's tough. 

[Former-Member]

@JessieB, 

My support network is small and none of my family is in it I have close 3 close friends my Dr and my psych.

I know it's harsh because my partner supports me alot that I did not include him in that list but he has trouble with certain aspects my mental health and I feel that he gets distant when I am struggling with switches and depression.

[Snowie]

@JessieB

I guess my situation is different with my husband my main support instead of my parents. I don't really have anyone else in my real life in my support system except for professionals. I have managed to push most other people away.

Where I do have that support and the confidence in talking to them is on this forum. Sometimes it is so much easier talking to someone going through the same issues, not having to explain everything, not being judged.

[Gina-Bell]

Such a good point @JessieB and speaks to what @mindboggle18 is saying too.

Sometimes there's a more suitable person to speak to - another trusted support person. 

And as you say @Former-Member sometimes that person may not be your partner either. 
Being able to identify who the support people is, or finding those people, is what's important. 

[HayleyC]

Q: Who else is in your network for support? And do you have the confidence to speak with them?

I'd say my support network is my friends and my mother. My friends and I all went through a psych degree together, and two of us are doing a Masters in Social Work, so we understand mental health a lot and how to help each other out. Having friends who are interested and understand MH, it's much easier to talk to them about your own MH because there is a lack of stigma - and I think this is something to be really grateful for because I've seen so many people who feel they can't talk to even their closest friends due to stigma and shame...

[NikNik]

So pleased to read that you have that experience here in the Forums @Snowie

[Teej]

My kids were also handed the SANE facts sheets about 4 years ago and I gave one to my mum. I think they were helpful a bit to begin to understand my diagnoses. 

Ive been racking my brain about people in my support network and there isn’t anyone I can talk to when I’m at my worst. 

I thought about it in it in relation to my kids. One of them reached out to a school counsellor. Another connected with the parents of his best mates. They were the ones who saved him at the time. I think it’s really important if you are young to find that person you can connect with to talk to. My first call was the uni counsellor. 

[mindboggle18]

@JessieB

I agree with reaching out for other people who maybe aren't your parents but who are also in that age gap who can provide experienced eyes and insight into what's going on. I talk to my aunty alot but the problem is she is also a psychiatrist and I find it difficult navigating the boarders of that relationship because she is my aunty first and foremost but she does have that Profesional view. 

Question- anyone have issues with talking to a friend who also happens to work in the mental health area?